Don't be shocked, but Miley Cyrus has been partying. Yes, she recently spent a few weeks in the hospital for an allergic reaction to antibiotics and one might reasonably assume that for health reasons she should probably be 'taking it easy' and 'recuperating' and 'getting right,' because as Lauryn Hill once said, "How you gonna win if you ain't right within?" But what these nosy busybodies aren't taking into account is that Miley Cyrus' main profession is to troll the world via colorful displays of shock-pop partying and now she's fallen several weeks behind in this endeavor! Miley Cyrus has A LOT of catching up to do partying-wise and that's what she's doing now. According to Page Six this includes hanging out with high-fashion drug vacuum Kate Moss in London nightclubs and getting photographed wearing "a bra and glittery leggings" in mixed company! That's right, Miley Cyrus is just traipsing around presumably cobblestone streets dressed in little more than her unmentionables. But, okay, disapproving Page Six blurbs aside, it would appear Cyrus really did get into some proper misbehavior during a recent performance at London's famed G-A-Y nightclub. According to TMZ (who has video), Cyrus was serenading a friend on his birthday and in the process educated the crowd with some questionable knowledge:
You know, everyone’s a little bit gay … It’s the truth. Everyone’s gay, all it takes is one cocktail. And if that doesn’t work, sprinkle something in their drink. That’s what I always do.
Cool joke! Now, nothing is as unsexy as a joke policeman, but huh? What exactly were you saying with that, Miley Cyrus? I suppose there is a time and a place for any kind of joke, but I'm truly baffled at the suggestion that putting roofies in someone's drink could turn them gay. It would make them at the very least a victim, but-- You know what, this is already exhausting. I'm exhausted. To be fair to Miley Cyrus, public speaking IS hard, especially doing stage banter when your main thing is singing. That's why Aimee Mann frequently tours with stand-up comics, so that THEY can do the between-song banter and there's less of a chance of Aimee Mann making a rape joke. Anyway, yeah. During that same gig Miley Cyrus returned to her comfort zone and fellated an enormous inflatable penis:
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