I n the vein of all things dolt, the world is at odds deciphering which Hollywood boy Taylor Swift penned "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" about.
Happy pill, dear? In the past, she has supposedly lyric-bashed Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer and Jake Gyllenhaal.
Swift's new song has my finger pointing at Croc's co-founder, George Boedecker.
A witness found him passed out in his Porsche over the weekend and called it in. According to the police report, he claimed Taylor Swift was behind the wheel first, but she ran off to Nashville via a nearby local yard. Allegedly.
So via distressed glorified mess, thar Taylor blew, in lyrics (and in my imagination):
"So he calls me up and he's like, 'I still love you,' and I'm like, I'm just... This is exhausting, you know like. We're never getting back together. Like ever."
Like, oh em God. It's like poetry to, like, our savage ears. Like, totally.
Mr. Boe, we hear Taylor's a square. Try the Michael Lohan next time. Now there's a likely culprit.
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